Well I often start conversations with “When i rule the world..” so I’ve put my money where my mouth is and I’ve started my own little on-line nation over at Nation States.
http://www.nationstates.net/small_blue_mushrooms
Pop in and say hi, its a blast 
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am.
Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.” I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow –but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now…
maremma pup
* 8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
* 9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
* 9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
* 10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
* 12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!
* 1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
* 3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
* 5:00 pm – Milk bones! My favorite thing!
* 7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
* 8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite
thing!
* 11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
part 2 coming soon
So…. its snack-attack time. Which one whets you appetite more, the fruit or the chocolate?
No… I’m only allowing two possible answers here, a third one would be terribly crass….. and I never do crass……
I’m a big fan of both. Give me watermelon, strawberries, bananas, kiwi fruit, apples, oranges, pears, plum, nectarines, apricots….. the list goes on… and I’m a happy man. When the sun is shining and then sky is blue then its fruit winning by a head. Once the sun goes down however….
That is when the chocolate demon comes… oh fear his glossy brown coat and shun his tempting whispers of fruit and nut….
I’ve got no idea why there is this shift, I’m sure I could find a tonne of research on appetite and eating patterns in relation to levels of light. However since my last little post took about four hours due to being reduced to dial-up speeds… I’m not going to… so there.
So what tickles your fancy? Fruit, Chocolate or Nuts?
It looks like there may finally be a viable synthetic blood on the horizon…. thanks once again to the swiss-army-knife of cellular biology, Stem Cells.
…. and on a completely unrelated note….
A path to hell paved with glossy publications, bad sound tracks, and RSI or a fun Friday night?
The hypocrisy of people never ceases to astound me.
So when it comes to the two P’s, where do you stand?
To paraphrase that late, great, George Carlin “Why is it illegal to sell something that you can give away for free?”
Korea has one of the largest prostitution industries in the world, with record numbers of participants. Hell, Korea has become the dive of choice for Japanese businessmen looking to get lucky with the local wildlife. If you go to a Singing Room, Coffee Shop, Massage Parlour, Barber, or Golf Room there is a good chance you can get a girl to ‘keep you company’ for a small additional fee. Yet despite this it is illegal to bring pornography into the country…. guess you’re supposed to skip the TV time and go experience the real thing…. the two faces of conservatism
“Blind prostitutes……….. You’ve got to hand it to them!“
Back to Porn..
If you stumbled across a porn DvD (no doubt accidentally put in the wrong Disney cover at your local movie library) and found that your significant other played a starring role, how would you act?
Oblivious. I wouldn’t even glance at vile pornography (ignorance is bliss)
Horrified. It is okay for me to watch porn, but only a pervert would do porn (hypocrisy option)
Intrigued. And ask my other half if they know any cool ‘tricks’ (curiosity kills)
Ashamed. Now I know exactly how I measure up to their previous partners (truth hurts)
Confused. They’ve never demonstrated that level of flexibility with me, and I had no idea about the octopus thingy either……. (do NOT go there)
Stupid quiz aside, the love of your life has/had a career in blue movies. How would you react to this……..
………….we have a comments section for a reason folks, so don’t be shy.
No doubt taking her stage name from a similar look to the young Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ashley come more under the ‘cute’ then ‘would leave my job, my wife, my ute, my dog, and my Tivo for her’ category.
The economy is circling the drain, our children can’t pay attention for more then 20 seconds, we’re all getting obese, the seas are rising, AIDs is spreading, there be dragons…..yada yada yada… eh… you get the picture….. its all doom and gloom across the world, except of course where no one gives a (rhymes with sit).
To top of our list of ills there’s a new evil in sight… according to the pundits Obama is leading America in to that great evil ‘socialism’…. Of course some of the bigwigs are going further and saying he’s the forerunner for the antichrist, while others are convinced that he’s ushering in a new Communist America.
Obama a socialist… them republicans are always good for a laugh….
..but I stopped laughing when it occurred to me that a good portion of those commenting in mainstream media and blowing their own trumpets on blogs not unlike this one actually have no idea what the difference between socialism and communism is. I’m sorry guys, if you don’t know you shouldn’t be a political commentator….. or a politician if it comes to that.
Of course you have to excuse many of the republicans making these claims, they still remember the McCarthy years and the whole ‘evil communism’ spiel that went with it. At their age they get confused…. computers are the work of Satan, and Betty Davis is no longer the #1 sex symbol in the hearts of Americans and there are things they don’t understand on TV. Naturally they think that Metropolis is the cutting edge in cinema (not that they’d watch something so controversial) and that the godless commies are a relevant threat in today’s world of economic crunch.
We all know the evil socialist countries that lurk in the world today, wringing their hands in a bad Fu-Manchu imitation as they plot the downfall of capitalism by encouraging America to splurge on sub-prime mortgages and borrow heavily from China…..oh….. never mind. Anyway I thought for the edification of my two readers I should highlight some of those evil nations with heavy socialist ideals like welfare and healthcare saturating their constitutions…
Okay, so I’m taking the piss, but the target is just so ripe..
So ask yourself… what would Jesus do.
Assuming you believe.. or pretend that you do when the fundamentalist come knocking.
Help the sick? Sure
Look after those less fortunate then you? Yep
Sounds like socialism to me.
Of course if you like the Big Brother (Orwell not reality TV) way America has been going… 1 out of every 100 adults in Jail, unauthorised phone taps, arrest and detainment without charges, and state sanctioned torture, then you should have asked yourself what would Uncle Joe do…
Actually… think about it…. Seriously think about it. A large number of the rising powers are a form of flexible communism. Those that didn’t adapt to the times have fallen by the wayside but China, Cuba and quite a few others still exist and seem to be on the rise. Maybe the simple truth is that any system that can’t adapt perishes.. even the mindless enthusiasm of a capitalist nation that can’t see the problem with the premise that an economy will be fine as long as it continues to grow.
Decadence and Pathos have been the downfall of many a society throughout history, abandon international diplomacy, social reform, infrastructure, intellectual expansion and physical activity and all you have left is a core of pointless politics, parasitic legal practices, and stupid fat bigoted xenophobic bastards.
Ohhh harsh, even for me…. time for my pharmaceutical fix to make the world a nice rosy place again…
A stunning redhead, Joey can be seen to do a lot more to tantalise. It was actually kind of hard to find images that were PG-13
Back in 19 *cough* *cough* there was a series of posts on one of the newsgroups that would one day evolve to be the EVIL OVERLORD list. It was basically a whimsical look of how things went wrong for the bad guys in every movie/book/comic and it developed slowly over a few months.
I actually lost track of its development after a while (this was back in the days when the Internet was really starting to expand, and porn was not its major function, so there were lots of newsgroups to trawl through), but I did have a dot-matrix print out of the list when it was 74 points long and still had one of my own suggestions in it. Of course I have no idea which one was mine, nor even if it survived the final cut in any form.
But here it is… in all its glory How to be an EVIL OVERLORD
