…a beast rise up out of the sea

Okay, first let me say that I’m not a big fan of politics, government or politicians.

Government is a necessary evil, while it serves a function it is also a bloated, self-important construct that exits as much to propagate its own existence as to serve the people. Lets just say that “The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the ever expanding needs of the bureaucracy”. When the biggest employer in most developed nations is the public sector you know that socialism is the unspoken master. 

Politicians are, by definition, scoundrels; their job is to ensure that they will be reelected and this ensures a very short-term look at the world, even as they trumpet policies crafted by committees of self-interested parties that will have long term effects on the world. We Australians assuming that every politician is a lying, self-serving, power hungry, bastard who wants attention while suckling from the tax payers teat. Sometimes we are pleasantly surprised when they prove us wrong.   

Any person who willingly seeks a high office of power, is inherently unsuited to that responsibility. The very qualities that the public seeks in a leader are the ones that make them dangerous, power-hungry, and unstable. 

Having said all that tomorrow let’s take a peak at Barack Obama as he looks from down under. Why? Because when America gets a sniffle we go searching for the tissues. For better or worse we are tied to that other Imperial Empire of red, white and blue. 

 

 

Um… no the other, other Micky Mouse one, it’ no longer 1900.

Yep that’s the one.

Always bet on the black

Okay, I know its just an old saying, and possibly the most stilted line from Passenger 57, but it fits. Speaking of fitting I recall an interview with Wesley Snipes that has stuck in my mind ever since. It was with an Aussie interviewer and the balls on this guy…. well it went something like this.

Wesley:…so they wanted a black star who wasn’t just sexy but could do martial arts.

Interviewer: So why did they chose you?

I am so far of my original topic now……

What I was going to talk about was the President Elect, the leader of the free world America in waiting, Barack Obama. My significant other wasn’t the only one who thought that America wasn’t ready for a black president, and there were a lot of indicators to suggest that she was right. America was the most powerful nation in the world, it led in industry, technology and sheer power from the 20’s well into the 90’s. It is no wonder then that so many mindsets, especially of the older generation, are still firmly entrenched in the xenophobic paranoia that has cemented the cold war ‘them’ and ‘us’ mentality of so many Americans.

Now if you are American and are reading this then you probably don’t fit into this category. 1) You must have some literacy skills, and education is the antithesis of insular-ism. 2) You probably came here from a ESL site, or were looking for information originating outside America which in turn means you have experienced or are at least aware of an existence outside the united states of America. 3) You are using the Internet which means you were probably born long after the McCarthy era of hate and fear.

Sadly, for many, America can no longer be an island. It is part of the larger world now, and in fact it is largely American ingenuity that has allowed that to happen. News flashes across the globe in a heartbeat and every second citizen is armed with a camera-phone. Hell, folks were arguing politics and urging each other to vote on the trade channels on World of Warcraft. In this era of free flowing communications, decentralized media (well you are reading a blog), and instant access to educational information, the vocal minority finally seems to be losing its grip.

The world is not flat, dinosaurs did not co-exist with humans, we are all the one species no matter our skin color, and America is part of the world. All hard revelations for some to swallow, but true nonetheless. In seeing the election of a black man (okay more mocha brown really) to the white house the rest of the world breathed a sigh of relief. No we don’t think he’ll be a political godsend, no one is going to fix the disastrous financial situation overnight. Hell, he might be the biggest political incompetant in American since Bush ever, but that is not the point. The point is that maybe, just maybe, America is no longer being held hostage by the ultra-conservative minority.

Good morning America, and welcome to a brave new world!

NRMA Unworry

As I drove up the East Coast of Australia a few things grabbed my attention. There was the gorgeous unpolluted vista of golden sands and and blue/green seas, there were the rolling hills and shapely trees, there were the bevies of bronze skinned and bikini clad babes, and there were the billboards that prove once again that Marketing is where retards go when the real world proves too hard for them.

For those that are unaware there is a rather large insurance agency in Australia called NRMA (National Roads and Motorists’ Association) that has been part of life in New South Wales (my home state) for as long as I can recall, and it appears to be expanding its services further into Queensland. Now just to confuse matters aparently NRMA Insurance, aquired by IAG following demutualisation, appears to have few links (other then historical) to its ancestor despite maintaining the name.  

Here, on my little 600km drive I see a billboard for NRMA, which is not exactly a shock as their founding concept was as road-side assistance. The new campaign however is something of an eye opener; maybe they are appealing to a new migrant consumer base by displaying that mastery of the English language isn’t that important. Maybe, but that isn’t my interpretation. Two words on a pale background, NRMA and unworry. What the hell is that?

Unworry? WTF is that? Are we just making up new words now the way banks have conjured up new charges to obscure their obscene profit gouging? Maybe their contract lawyers will make up new words to explain the otherwise unexplainable cost on their dockets. Come on if the Marketing team, targeting an English speaking consumer base, can’t speak English what the hell is going on? Then there is the brand association with the orginal entity, are all their road-side assist folks qualified in Mr Whippy service? Do we get a free ice cream cone and a lot of head scratching?

Come on guys… making up new words doesn’t make you hip and trendy, it make you illiterate and quite possibly retarded. Please at least try to look competent, (unlike myself who had to be given a slap upside the head by Morgan (see below)) appearance is everything.

Need assistance with that flooding problem? Fear not NRMA Insurance marketing will be there to make up new words to distract you from the problem.

Disclaimer 1: Retardation is an actual problem that shouldn’t be mocked. Brain dead marketing wankers that make up new words in a pathetic attempt to justify their existence should not be confused with those suffering actual mental impairment. The first group are losers who should get a real job (and be mocked for it) while the second group are just unfortunate.

Disclaimer 2: I’ve actually been with NRMA and their roadside assistance has always been excellent. When the thingimy on my car (motortransport) fell off (dissattached) they were there to fix (post-emptively maintain) it in a jiffy (a microhour or about 40 minutes)

Quote of the [inert time period here]

“American is a very difficult language mixed with English.”